I’ll start by saying that I almost have a college degree, I’m almost studying law, so I’m almost a lawyer. I know that “almost” makes a big difference, but whatever. After all, it’s my website and I won’t hesitate to use it. Due to the current situation (the holidays and the new year) I would like to offer my wishes, and the graphic ones above don’t exhaust my abilities :-), so:
Legal Christmas and New Year wishes 2009
Wishes offered to you (hereinafter referred to as the “Wish Recipient”) by me (hereinafter referred to as the “Wisher”). *
Please accept, with no express or implied legally binding force, best wishes for an environmentally friendly, socially conscious, stress-free, non-addictive, and gender-neutral winter solstice holiday, celebrated within the traditions of the religious denomination or secular practices of the Wish Recipient’s choice, in particular in accordance with the traditions of Christmas, Hanukkah, or Kwanzaa, with due respect for the religious or secular beliefs or traditions of third parties, or their choice not to practice any religious or secular traditions, as well as for a financially profitable, personally successful, and medically uncomplicated course of the generally accepted calendar year 2010, with due respect for the calendars adopted by national, ethnic, or religious minorities, regardless of the race, religion, political or philosophical views, skin color, age, degree of physical ability, choice of computer platform, or sexual preference of the Wish Recipient.
Terms of acceptance and warranty
* Acceptance of these wishes constitutes simultaneous acceptance of the following terms and reservations. These wishes are subject to further clarification, withdrawal, or revocation by the Wisher without any notice period and without the need for justification. These wishes may be freely transferred by the Wish Recipient in their unaltered form to third parties. These wishes do not imply any promise on the part of the Wisher to actually implement any of the aforementioned wishes, and in particular do not constitute an offer within the meaning of the relevant provisions of law. Any fragments of these wishes that contradict absolutely binding provisions of law shall be deemed unsubmitted, without affecting the remaining fragments of the wishes. These wishes have no financial value. The Wisher guarantees the performance of these wishes in accordance with the generally accepted performance of wishes regarding good news for a period of one year or until the issuance of subsequent holiday wishes, whichever occurs first. The warranty is limited to the replacement of these wishes or the issuance of new wishes, without the need for justification by the Wisher.